In life, we all make mistakes. It's how we get out of them that shows our presence of mind. However, not everyone has this particular skill. From the wrong sort of snow to the dog ate it via I fell on the vacuum - how anyone ever thought they'd get away with these howlers is a complete mystery. The Little Book of Crap Excuses is a hilarious collection of pointless prevarication, walloping white lies and appalling apologies. Insurance claim: Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have. Jonah's mother: That's a nice story, but now tell me where you've really been for the last three days.