'It was like being the village idiot with O-levels. I jack-knifed trailers, got outwitted by even the dimmest animals and was dragged through a hedge backwards on a tractor . . .' Richard Benson was never cut out for the family farm, but he returned from London when his dad had to sell up - and found that their shared loss was part of a profound change in rural life. 'In the house after the sale, dad gave a heavy raspy sigh and sank against my mum. Everything seemed to freeze for a moment as the clock kept ticking . . .'