This is a collection of wise and wacky words of advice, from the bestselling and award-winning author of Why Eating Bogeys Is Good For You. From the marvellous mind of Mitchell Symons comes such gems of wisdom as: You can't trust a dog to watch your food. Why buy shampoo when real poo is free? Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, as you won't have a leg to stand on. And if getting even doesn't work, then just get odd.